it’s all in the details

today, a month or more after we were requested to be involved, moo and i participated in a sticker club mail out fun thing (better late then never, right?). we chose stickers for our appointed chain mail addressees, we packaged and mailed them, and we (mostly me) smiled wide and true thinking of little friends receiving them, surprised and delighted, as he was, when his stickers came in the mail.

now, i am not the mom who makes cupcakes for the preschool party. i don’t prep or facilitate craft activities. i don’t throw theme parties for moo and friends. and, unfortunately, i am not one of the mothers who got the psychic memo that good moms write christmas cards to all the little kids at the daycare (dropped the ball hard there). i am the mom, however, who, even on this rainy and awful day, trapped at home under blankets of illness, can always see the value of bringing joy to children (deserving, all of them) and who tries to do everything in my limited power to contribute to said light as often as able.

now, sadly, this was not exclusively a pure and giving mission. full disclosure…  i am also the mom that is peacocking around all smug and bragging widely that i: a) remembered our outstanding invite to play; b) didn’t lose explanation of game details amongst important adult centered paperwork; and c) actually participated in something endearing.

i can’t help it. though this was designed to be a fun little nicety to please the wee in our lives, it also somehow felt like a test for me. was i gonna be the kind of mother who would break the link? no, nay sayers, i was not.

so, yah, i’m feeling pretty damn adequate right about now. does my regular neurosis and sometimes panic that i will never be a contender in the realm of cutie patootie moms make me less of a consistent/interesting/kind/stable/confident/likeable person? too bad. it made me rise to be a better mother today. true story.


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